I Have Always Been A Smart Ass

I have always been a smart ass. Apparently. I realized this while talking to a cousin who is also a friend today. I forget about the things I have done and said over the years, but sometimes when I talk to people, it triggers a memory and then I tell a story about something I did. Sometimes I make people laugh. That is fun.  

So, this one is about the Marine Corps too. It just worked out that way. We were living in Southern California at the time, off base (Yay!) and I was on my way to the El Toro Marine Corps Base to pick up my husband. He had worked an overnight shift and I was driving to pick him up in the morning.

I was heading to the front gate. There was a big truck in front of me. He slammed on his brakes and stopped. I did the same. I came to a stop inches away from the truck. I let out a huge sigh that I did not hit the truck.

WHILE I did that, the car behind me hit me, HARD. It was like a cartoon. I was sighing, then BAM. At least, I was really relaxed when the car hit me. The truck just drove away, didn’t pull over to give me his insurance information, and I was pissed about that make no mistake, especially a few minutes later when my FUCKING front bumper fell off. (The car behind me had pushed me, okay SLAMMED me, into the big fucking truck in front of me.)

The man behind me was a young enlisted Marine. And I was a smart ass. We talked and he said he was sorry and we both said how shocked we were that the truck drove away and did not stay to exchange insurance information. It was a huge tow truck or something like it and my car did not even scratch it, as I recall.

 We exchanged information. 

Then the young, very scared Marine said, your husband isn’t an officer, is he? I could not resist. I told him that my husband was a Major and he was going to be PISSED. It was a complete lie. My husband was a Lieutenant..

 

non military people, he was an officer but not a Major. I was twenty some years old, I don’t know why he thought I would be married to a Major, but I was being a smart ass……. joking, you know?

He looked even more panicked and after I laughed at him, well, I did……. I told him that I was just kidding and my husband was a Lieutenant.
and he was a really good guy and everything would be okay. I told him he would not be angry. He didn’t look like he believed me, although I had no idea why he wouldn’t.

When he met my husband a little while later, that young Marine was much calmer. Bill was not exactly thrilled that our first new car EVER was now dented but he was his usual calm self and he didn’t scare that young Marine.

I think I’ve been having a lot more fun than I realized.

 

 

 

 

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About jambiethoughts

My name is Jamie W. Bryant,. Sometimes I drop the W. I am a currently a 55 year old woman with a serious sense of whimsy. I was having a hard time describing myself but when a friend said everyone wanted to be a princess, men and women, I said to call me a Queen, Warrior Queen. I think Whimsical Happy sometimes Silly Warrior Queen Who Takes No Shit But Is Really Kind and loves to have fun but is really responsible might do it. It is long, however I have never been good at editing myself, in SO MANY WAYS, so there is that. If you still have no idea who I am, well, read my blog and try to figure it out. I can be serious. I can be silly. I love to make myself and others laugh. I speak real shit. I believe everyone should be treated with respect, and I will if you will. I calls them as I sees them. I sometimes swear. Gasp! I do not swear when I am in the presence of children, but this blog is for grown ups. You have been warned.
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2 Responses to I Have Always Been A Smart Ass

  1. thehouseai says:

    That’s one thing I can’t claim – I have never been a smartass, even though I have had ample opportunities where it would be the perfect response. Too scared of everything I guess. LOL! I never had that much fun.

  2. Shari says:

    I don’t remember you as a smart ass in HS. Did that come out after escaping the Valley?

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